Why You Might Know Them - R&B singers and all-too-close brothers from the late 1990's
- Sang such classics as "all my life" and "crazy" (no I can't tell the two songs apart either)
- You were a hormonal teen in their hay-day
- You are their mother
What They Are Doing Now
K-Ci
K-Ci recently divorced white and overweight wife and is now trying to make it big again as a solo artist. JoJo stole his custom baby grand piano (I'll get to that later) so K-Ci has been reduced to carrying around a karaoke machine to various synagogues and community centers, baby steps people. To make ends meet in the meantime, K-Ci works part time at Applebee's. They won't let him sing at their periodic karaoke events because they think he's homeless and crazy because he claims to be a R&B "icon". So sad.
JoJo
If you thought that sounded bad, its time to discuss JoJo. JoJo is an alcohol dependent toll booth operator. At least he was until about a month ago when he had his epic confrontation with his estranged brother. EZ-Pass is the equivalent to Mexicans for "hardworking Americans", railroad making machines for John Henry, artificial limbs for peg widdlers, Netflix for blockbuster, and google for advice on how to kill someone (I see you Casey Anthony). The out of a job alcoholic crooner made his way to K-Ci's double wide the night he got fired and begged K-Ci to let him back, and that they would be stars again. K-Ci cried, prayed for JoJo and kicked him out because he was late for his dinner shift. Later that night, as K-Ci was trying to explain that you get either a soup OR a salad, not both to the redneck anniversary table, JoJo was drunk in K-Ci's yard, singing "giirrrlll yoouu arre cloose to mee jusss like my muthaa closeeee to me jus like mah fatha close to me juss like my sistahh..." (breaks down and cries when he gets to the part about his brotha). He eventually gathered himself and broke into the house to steal the piano. It has since been sold on Ebay for $29.99. JoJo now lives in the back room of a church, where he gets kick out of every Sunday for smelling bad and trying to add impromptu solos during "the great amen".
I hold out hope that they will eventually end up back in the public eye--either on "The People's Court" or when JoJo gets busted on "Bait Car".
